Painting within

When I start on a painting I ask myself these questions. Do I want to just paint something lovely or do I want to get to the heart of the matter? Do I want to push or dare myself to take this painting further? Don't get me wrong I love to paint lovely scenes but I want more and hunger for that, to unleash myself and paint within. That is what I strive for and love to be in that zone.

At times when I am painting a subject I find myself painting it several times differently, tighter,looser more abstract etc... Constantly wanting to learn more with each painting to discover something new for me. The only way I have found to be better at my craft is to do it everyday. To live it and breathe it for that painting to become a part of me. Is this what they call passion? I believe so, it takes a hold of you and puts you on a delirious drunken ride. Or maybe instead of passion this is being obsessive compulsive about your work. My husband and children maybe could testify to that! They lose me at times when I am involved with my paintings. I will assure you I do surface from my studio for dinner and to spend time with the children and grandchildren but if I am working on something interesting it is there in my mind constantly reworking it or questioning it.

I believe painting within is being true to yourself to be honest with your paintings to let go and paint as if no one will ever see this painting, paint it for YOUR SELF. Not all those paintings will be brilliant but they will have that passion that is lit inside you and that will show on your canvas. It will push you to be more than you thought you could be and in contrast it will humble you to show how much more there is to learn and to let go of.